FAA Week 8 Lines and Predictions - presented by Zuc
Norfolk (3-4) -8.5 Mt Lebo (3-4)
Both teams come into this game looking to get out of the basement of their divisions. The Shipmen avg a dismal 66.9 ppg this season yet somehow have managed to win two consecutive games. RBs Frank Gore (vs SEA) and Clinton Portis (at DET) are set to have monsterous outings against two of the worst defenses in the league. Kurt Warner has been impressive this season (#4 FAA QB/20.8 ppg) in the FAA but this week he airs it up versus the sting Carolina D. WR Braylon Edwards has not lived up to his potential in '08 however WR Cotchery should have a solid day as Jet Favre bounces back after last week's loss to the Raiders. The Outlaws also pulled out two straight Ws and average nearly 23 more ppg than Norfolk. Calvin Johnson (#2 FAA WR / 13.7 ppg) is a prime choice especially now that Roy Williams departed for the circus in Dallas. Mt Lebo's backfield is comprised of 2 RBBC as Forte is on a bye and Fast Willie is still banged up. Parker may return although it is bleak. The G-Men are likely to sack Big Ben 5-6 times and force a couple turnovers. I'll smoke a blunt with the Outlaws bench but giving the points taking the Shipmen to cover comfortably.
Imperial (4-3) -3.5 Tokyo (1-6)
The East Division leading Maulers are riddled by injuries to Anquan Boldin and Sammy Morris in addition to the #3 FAA WR, Greg Jennings, on a bye. Big Ben won't have much time in the pocket but should be able to throw a few balls into the endzone despite having his deep threat suspended for being on a date with Mary Jane. You gotta like the RB matchups with Thomas Jones (vs KC) and Donut White (vs IND). The wideout performance is shakey to say the least as unproven Donnie Avery gets his first start and Boldin iffy. I wouldn't be surprised to see Nate Washington inserted before kickoff. The Kamikazes won last week after starting the season 0-6. This team is just not very good averaging a league low 66.6 ppg thus far in the year of ObamaMania. QB Cassel is no Tom Brady but did appear to show flashes of being a capable fill-in last week and hopes to continue at home against the Rams. Be cautious however as the St Louis defense reeled off two straight most recently shutting down the Cowboys in a shocker. RBs Ronnie Brown (vs BUF) and Brandon Jacobs (at PIT) face stout defenses. The WR combo of Wes Welker and Lee Evans is simply just okay. Again, Tokyo is just not that good. Give the points and go with Limpy in a low scoring affair.
Pittsburgh (3-4) +9.5 Aliquippa (3-4)
These teams are both 3rd in their respective divisions and need a win badly. The Ballers are coming off a loss and need big play from all starters this week to avoid add to the "L" column. QB Peyton Manning is not the same as he once was. He still has the weapons to put up huge numbers although the undefeated Titans won't make it easy. Is Julius Jones really the sole RB suiting up? Reports out of Seattle imply that Maurice Morris will see much more time. The Cardinals @ Panthers game portrays incredible talent with Larry Fitzgerald and Steve Smith taking the field. Patrick Crayton is now 3rd on the Dallas depth chart but for some reason remains a starter for the Ballers. The Cowboys defense is trainwreck. Aliquippa started the season 3-1 but has lost 3 weeks in a row. Others have mentioned this is one of the most over-rated teams in the FAA and the recent three game slide backs this up. QB Jason Campbell should have an above average day against the hapless Lions. The young backfield consists of both rookies in Steve Slaton (vs CIN) and Chris Johnson (vs IND) who have reportedly signed multi-year deals to remain in Aliquippa long term. WR Santana Moss is out to prove that he is a better value than Julius Jones after being traded away from Pittsburgh in late trade last week. Ocho Stinko is penciled in for the start. Despite the rumors that Antonio Gates is on his way out of Aliquippa he remains on the squad. Defensive production hopes to improve with the addition of Carolina. Look for Aliquippa to win but not cover the spread. Take the points if you're a betting man.
Sewickley (6-1) -2.5 (Henderson (3-4)
The F-Bombs gave up 102 pts last week yet managed to put up 103 to hand the Clients their first loss of the season last week. The mighty F-Bombs don't appear to be so mighty this week with Aaron Rodgers (#1 FAA QB / 21.7 ppg) on a bye and RB Stephen Jackson dinged up. Reports are speculating that he may be scratched from the lineup in week 8. I was expecting Larry Johnson to get the nod however his recent abuse of women has him sidelined. The 3 WR set of Desean Jackson, Reggie Wayne, and Anthony Gonzalez all have big play potential. The success of the Hitmen depends primarily on the play of QB McNabb as the rest of the lineup does not have much star quality. RB Maurice Jones-Drew (vs CLE) could bust it for a big day. WR Hines Ward should see plenty of work due to the suspension of Santonio "Bluntman" Holmes. WR Kevin Curtis is averaging 0.0 ppg simply because he has not taken the field as he returns from his injury. How much work will he get remains to be seen. I'm staying away from this one as it could go either way but if I were forced to place a bet I'd lean towards Sewickley as they know how to win.
Albany (4-3) -6.5 Honolulu (2-5)
BA and his daddy are talking the talk and walking the walk putting out three straight wins. They are in sole 2nd place in the Central. Did you know that the Patroons have the highest PA (Points Against) in the league? QB Drew Brees (#2 FAA QB / 21.6 ppg) was held w/o a TD last week but should rebound nicely this week against the porus San Diego defenders. RBs Marshawn Lynch (at MIA) and Mewelde Moore (vs NYG) are expected to get much action. The WR combo of the aging Harrison and young talented phenom in AJ are great weapons to have at your disposal. The Patriots embarrassed the Broncos on MNF but they have lost their cheapshot artist for the year. The Destroyers bring QB Eli Manning to Heinz Field where the environment is expected to be beyond hostile. RB LT (at NO) has been hampered by a lingering injury and could be spelled early if it causes him greater agony. RB Michael Turner (#4 FAA RB / 16.0 ppg) may not find much room against the fierce Eagles D. I am unable to come up with material for the remainder of his lineup. Well, the Jets do host the pathetic Chiefs. Get the diapers ready because BA should dirty the Destroyers drawers. Give the points and go with Albany.
*GAME OF THE WEEK*
Jersey (4-3) +6 New York (6-1)
The Jackers appear to be having multiple QBRs as they have RB Adrian Peterson on his active roster even though he is on a bye. We should expect Earnest Graham (at DAL) to be inserted before kickoff. Jet Favre will undoubetdly be the gunslinger he is known as he is looking to mend his OT loss to the Raiders last weekend. This week he welcomes Kansas City and their horendousness. RB Marion Barber (vs TB) will be working for every bit of yardage but should manage to put up his #2 FAA RB average (16.9 ppg) or more. The Jackers WR duo of TJ Whosyourmamma and Laveraneus Coles are not exactly sure things although they could easily double their avg any given Sunday. The Titans host the Colts on MNF. The Clients are good. They have only lost 3 games since the start of last year. No matter what O says NY is ticked off after putting up 102 last week and end up losing. QB Philip Rivers (#3 FAA QB / 21.1 ppg) should have Chris Chambers back and should not have an issue against the Saints defense. RB Brian Westbrook (vs ATL) is expected to return from his ankle injury and should receive several standing ovations throughout the game in Philadelphia. RB Willis McGahee (vs OAK) appears to be as healthy as he is going to get and although he put up a big game last week he may have difficulties against the Raiders not to mention being spelled by Le'Ron McClain and possibilly even Ray Rice. I'm not saying that McGahee is not going to produce rather saying it may be a bit more troublesome than last week BUT this game is being played in Baltimore. The WR duo of Randy Moss and Terrell Owens is a beautiful thing. Not having Tom Brady and Tony Romo throwing to them however is not so great. TE Witten is the best in the league. The Ravens D could get a shutout. Hey Carc! Schedule another QBR as you'll probably get more enjoyment out of it than your losing to the Clients. I like the Clients to cover but not by much.
Even though the Jersey Jackers have been missing since after week 4 of the FAA season Aliquippa is still preparing as if there will be a game.
